Never Be a Sucker: Have You Ever Been Misquoted, Misunderstood—or Have You Been the One Who Missed the Big Picture…
Have you ever said something to another person, and they didn’t take it the right way? They got the wrong message, one you never intended… in fact, they “heard” something you didn’t even say?
It’s pretty common that people hear the words of others and put their own spin on them. Sometimes they hear what they want to hear. Sometimes they even hear what they don’t want to hear… and still give you the credit for saying it.
If you’ve read my book (shameless plug: If you haven’t, click on the cover above to get yours) you probably know more about me than I realized I was giving up when I wrote it. But here’s something you don’t know about me: I’m into movies. Especially the old ones. There’s nothing like a good movie, and sure, they still make good ones, but there’s nothin’ like the old ones.
I’m no expert on old cinema, just a fan. Hey, you won’t find this stuff at Blockbuster, but thanks to Netflix you can still get anything you want, so lately I’ve been going through the works of Edward G. Robinson and James Cagney, among others. The other night I watched Cagney’s Angels with Dirty Faces (1938), probably his most famous film, and a great example of his ability to play the cool, likeable… and ruthless gangster.
I never watched a Cagney movie as a kid, but I’d grown up occasionally hearing the “You dirty rat” quote. It was the line everybody associated with him, the most memorable he’d ever spoken. But there’s just one problem: He never said it.
Just like Cary Grant never said his most best known line, “Judy, Judy, Judy.”
And Humphrey Bogart never said, “Play it again, Sam,” in Casablanca.
It’s interesting that these three men are more associated with these lines—ones they never said—than with anything they actually did say.
How does that happen? It’s one thing to be misquoted, but for the misquotes to overshadow all their thousands of actual lines? That’s amazing. It’s also proof that from a marketing standpoint, the unintentional or unforeseen can be more powerful and lasting than the most clever of publicity ploys. These memorable, yet fictitious lines have kept these guys and their films in the public consciousness for decades.
So if legendary film stars can be misquoted for 70 years running, you and I are at great risk, too. Putting your words across so they’re understood as you mean them doesn’t happen by accident. But they can easily be misunderstood by accident.
But the even greater risk is that you’ll miss the real—the hidden—meanings in what others are saying. Even when deception and lying aren’t at play outright, not being astute with the words puts us at a handicap. People fall prey to this all the time, too. It can cause you to pay too much for a new car, miss out on a business opportunity, or misinterpret a personal conversation.
Everything you do depends on how deftly you speak, and how well you’re able to decipher the subtleties of what’s said to you.
So there was a line in Angels that struck me, spoken by Cagney’s character, Rocky Sullivan: “Always remember, never be a sucker.”
Good advice then.
Good advice now.
Good advice always.
Pay attention to what’s said… people are always revealing more than they mean to.
-jef